Tommy's Journal

Tuesday, February 19th


I had to get up at 4:15 am to make my flight home to houston out of sioux falls. I had to get up the next morning at 4:15 am to make my flight to cozumel and get on a ship. That is the worst part of my job which makes it officially the greatest job in the world. I don't mind getting up early to go be a comic. It would suck if I had to get up early and go dig a ditch, but it is easy to get out of bed to do what I want to do.
I got to work last week at Nitwits in Sioux Falls, South Dakota. It is one of my favorite comedy clubs. The crowds there are great and the local comics that host the show are way funnier than they think they are. It is hard to describe a good comedy club crowd. For me, I like folks who aren't judgemental. People who judge you joke to joke. I worked the comedy showcase in houston the week before and they are fun, but once you win them over, they will laugh at anything. The folks in Sioux Falls are pretty good at judging each bit individually. It is a creative environment. I know if I do a joke they don't like, I haven't lost them, they will be there for the next topic. I look forward to going back.
I am on the carnival liberty now. I had two shows tonight and I have another tomorrow. I am not a regular on any of the carnival ships, but I seem to work this one more than the others so I am comfortable here. It is fun to come back to ships after spending two weeks working clubs.
tommy on 02.19.08 @ 12:48 AM CST [link] [No Comments]

Tuesday, February 12th


Three of the four shows on Friday and Saturday at the Comedy Showcase in Houston were sold out. The show thursday night had over 200 empty seats, friday and saturday they were turning people away. None of these folks were there to see me specifically, they are just going out to see comedy. I've been performing at the Comedy Showcase for the last ten years or so pretty regularly. I've performed there as an opener, a feature, a headliner, and a guest setter. It is one of my home clubs and I really love working there and I love their regular crowd. I will more than likely headline there again before the end of the year.
It is funny how much I have changed as a comic since I started working there. I've said many times, my act is a work in progress. The more shows I do the more I learn about this business and often, even educated opinions about my performance change drastically. There was a time when I would have told you that I am a better comic when I leave the mic in the stand and don't touch it and stand behind it and do my jokes. There was a time where I would have said that I should never sit down onstage. There was a time where I believed that every single one of my jokes should be delivered with one foot in front of the other and as close to the front of the stage as possible. I've performed loud and fast, quiet and slow, completely deadpan, and smiling the whole time.
For a long time I've had the unwavering opinion that I was there to perform my act, that I shouldn't question or bait the audience, (e.g. "Who likes McDonald's? I don't and here's why...) because that gives the audience the wrong idea about their role in the show. They may think that the whole act is a two way conversation.
Some of my jokes used to begin with rhetorical questions ("Don't you love cruise ships?"). I didn't used to think this was a problem.
Last time I worked Vegas, I was working with the legendary Kip Addotta and one of the many pieces of advice he gave me was to not ask the audience any questions. I took all of those lines out of my act and it helped.
I used to think if something happened in the crowd (drunk lady yells something incoherent, guy spills a drink in his lap) that it was disfunctional not to acknowledge it. I now believe that there is nothing wrong with being onstage and continueing to work through some distractions.
Many of the folks in the big crowds at the Showcase want to be part of the show. Even when you are killing and the whole crowd is loving the show, there are always a few folks in that room that want some attention and they think they will get it by yelling stuff out. Some just want to talk to their friends at their table about each of the jokes and add their own punchlines. I'm not going to tell you to stop yelling stuff at me, I know you can't, but I am going to tell you that I don't believe right now that it is in my best interest to do anything but ignore you. I will keep performing, you will keep yelling and the people you came with will try to quiet you down first, then, some strangers at another table, then, club security gives you a warning. Finally, club security kicks you out. Now your friends need to decide whether to leave now, too, or leave you alone in the parking lot. Friends, when you leave early, don't be mad at the club or the comic, you are the one who brought the crazy loud person.
If you have a friend or a relative who just can't keep their mouth shut at a show, you have two choices as I see it, leave them home or bring them to the Comedy Showcase for the Thursday night show. They won't kick you out of that one, they need your drink money that night.
Headed to Sioux Falls tomorrow to play Nitwits. Those crowds up there are extremely well behaved, almost spooky in their attentiveness. I guess nobody wants to get kicked out when it is -5 degrees and snowing.
tommy on 02.12.08 @ 12:11 PM CST [link] [No Comments]

Friday, February 8th


At showtime last night there were 11 people in the audience not including the comics on the show and the local comics and friends of comedy who always hang out at the Comedy Showcase. The club told me that their policy was at least 14 audience members to have a show. They asked me if I wanted to cancel the show. I've wrote about this before. When you start doing stand-up comedy your whole goal is to get onstage as much as possible. Every time you don't get to perform, you are falling behind. I've never told the club I wanted to cancel the show. I never will. I always want to do the show.
The show was good. The Comedy Showcase has always been a club that supports new talent and gives real stage time to new comics. We had a couple of guest sets from very new comics and a couple of sets from real pros before I went up and it was a pretty good show. Some crowd members showed up after the show started so by the time I got up there there were 20 audience members and about 15 comics and others hanging out in the back. I really had fun onstage and did a couple of new jokes about the presidential election that went well.
I could easily say 'I'm not doing a show for 11 people' and go home early and still get paid. I could easily do the exact same act I did last time I worked this club a couple of years ago. I want to do a show and I want to do new jokes. I'm proud of my career and I've come to terms with the fact that it may never go any further than this. I may have achieved all of the status and success that this business has for me up to this point, but I know that my act is still a work in progress and I know I could get funnier. The only way I know how to improve is to do the show and to try the new jokes.
tommy on 02.08.08 @ 09:41 AM CST [link] [No Comments]

Tuesday, February 5th

It's just like David and Goliath but the Giants won.


I have often said that I could never work cruise ships all of the time. The crowds are consistently so good and so much larger than comedy club crowds that they make me feel as if I am better at this than I am. Cruise ship crowds make me feel like I am no longer a work in progress, like I have arrived. I love working comedy clubs and try to be in them half of the time to keep my act fresh and to keep me creating and trying to improve.
We did a show after the super bowl. It was easily the worst show I have ever had on a cruise ship and one of my five worst of all time. Victor Zuniga opened the show and was great, he is always great. The crowd sounded tired while he was out there. They must have been, because by the time I got out there, they were asleep. I tried and tried to wake them like the kid in the smoke filled house trying to wake up his meth addict mom in the fire on the after school special, but the only person I could wake up was really loud and not too friendly. When I walked out onstage, I told the crowd that playing me on was the bands last thing to do, so they were done working so clap while they leave. It is a little joke thing I've done a few times and it always gets me a free drink from one of the musicians after the show. While they were leaving, some of the folks in the crowd thought that was their chance to leave, too. I hadn't even done my first joke and I was already walking them. I am typing all of this with a smile on my face, just wanted to let you know. As the crowd shrunk, they got a little better and the end of my show wasn't all that bad. For those of you who have been reading my 'blogs' since they were 'online journals', this wasn't as bad Atlantic City, but it was close.
The best part was, during this horrible performance of mine (I wouldn't dare blame the crowd, seriously) I had to invite people to my late show. I was advertising myself. 'If you would like to spend another awkward half hour not laughing, come back here at midnight for my "R" rated show."
About 30 people showed up for the late show, but it was a pretty good crowd and I think we all agree, it was a really good late show. I did have enough time to individually poll the crowd and though they were exit polls which can be unrealiable, they seemed to enjoy it.
I'm in comed clubs on land for the next two weeks which I am looking very forward too. I can sharpen up the act to get ready for the spring break ship crowd.
Shot some sketches with some friends a few months ago. If this link works, check it out:
http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=2089507613
tommy on 02.05.08 @ 12:11 PM CST [link] [No Comments]

Sunday, February 3rd


Yesterday, I signed off of the Liberty in Ft. Lauderdale and flew to Nassau in the Bahamas to sign onto the Fascination. Often, when signing onto a ship you get delayed at various points for certain reasons. Sometimes there is a huge line at the airport to go through customs or immigration, sometimes the customs officials at the port make you wait before going to the ship to search your luggage. Sometimes ship security doesn't have your name on their paper work, sometimes the master of staff administration (or MSA, like the HR supervisor on the ship) isn't available when you finally get on the ship to give you your cabin key and sometimes, the cabin isn't ready for you to occupy it. It is usually just one or two of these places where you get held up and you can never really predict where it will be.
I made it all the way on board the ship without any delays yesterday. The MSA just happened to be in her office when I signed on. She gave me my cabin number and a phone number to call if it was locked. Okay, most ships use the coded magnetic key card system that you find in hotels today for their crew cabins, but some have actual metal cabin keys. As a fly-on, I occupy a cabin that was occupied by another fly-on a few nights before I get on and will be occupied by some other fly-on when I get off. Since this cabin on this ship only has one metal key, and comics aren't the most responsible folk in the world, sometimes these keys get misplaced. Sometimes on the ships the policy is that the fly-on act leave the key on the desk and the door unlocked. Unfortunately, the cabin stewards who clean the cabin and make the beds out of habit will lock the door afterwards. That is what happened yesterday. When I get to my cabin I just want to unpack and take a little nap usually. I was stuck waiting in the hallway hoping that the housekeeping guy who I talked to on the phone understood that I needed him to come down and unlock my cabin.
Well, it was a very good thing I was waiting in the hallway. There are two types of fly-ons. One type is the stand-up comic, the other is the variety act. The variety act is a juggler, magician, or music act usually. Most of the family shows on ships consist of one comic with one variety act. I work as both, sometimes I do the whole show myself, sometimes I am the juggler working with the comic and sometimes I am the comic working with the variety act. This is really fun for me, because when I am on as the variety act I have the unique priviledge of getting to see and work with the other comics, something they don't get to do, and when I am on as a comic, I get to work with and see what the other variety acts are doing. Among the best variety acts on Carnival are the Zunigas. The Zunigas are a legendary Mexican circus family who are amazing jugglers. Three of them work for Carnival, each with solo acts. There is Uncle Manny, Manny Jr., and Victor. These guys are my heros. I love working with them because aside from being fantastic jugglers, they are really funny and crowds love them. While I was waiting in the hall for my cabin to be unlocked, out of an adjacent cabin came both Manny Jr. and Victor. Manny Jr. is on the Celebration and they were also docked in Nassau so he came over to have a juggling workout with his brother Victor. If I hadn't been waiting for my cabin to be unlocked, I wouldn't have even ran into them. They invited me up to work out with them. My cabin was unlocked soon after and I changed and took my props up to the stage. Juggling with these guys was such a rare treat. We spent a few hours trying to show each other up on the stage. The brothers are very competetive in a fun way. I'm not terribly competetive, but I do try to make sure that folks out on these ships understand that I am a real juggling act, not just a comic who juggles a little to try to pick up some extra work. At one point Manny and I were both juggling seven balls while Victor was juggling seven rings. That workout hardly ever happens on land, let alone on a ship. I juggled way too much. Both of the Zuniga brothers are older than me, but they are thick chested and muscular. After our workout, my arms felt like they were ready to fall off. I took my nap and woke up really sore. It was totally worth it.
After the Super Bowl tonight, Victor and I are doing the family show and I will do the R-rated show at midnight after that.
tommy on 02.03.08 @ 10:44 AM CST [link] [No Comments]